Ah readers, have I pulled you in?? So this little space on the web is going to be focused on FFS. Not For Fvcks Sake, no. Rather, it will be about my upcoming Facial Feminization Surgery. As you can tell from my little page, I am a trans femme nonbinary woman, and I am getting FFS in some months. It will, indeed , be before the end of 2025. Yes, I am ecstatic! Yes, I was shaking with joy when I received the email from my surgeons office that said “Congratulations!! Your surgery date is ______…” And yes, of course, I am a bit terrified. This is my face. Besides my tattoos and my locs, the first thing a person will notice will be my face. I don’t need it butchered. Honestly, FFS is expensive, and the amount of hoops I had to jump through (along with assistance from Egg) make me proud that I have gotten this far.
I have been researching and dreaming about FFS since 2014. I have looked at multiple surgeons, with multiple price points, and what they thought would be best for me. See, FFS is not one surgery. It is multiple surgeries that will have me under anesthesia for up to 14 hours or more. I have been under for previous surgeries , but nothing this extensive, nor this long. I have had consults, and talked with many (trans) women who have had some type of FFS. By all accounts it is a brutal, traumatic surgery, and the first few days to weeks will probably be the most pain I have been in over the entirely of my life so far. As luck would have it, while in a support group, a woman mentioned that she had FFS recently, and she looked fleeky deeky (really good). Her surgeon, and her surgical team, including the front office staff, happened to be local!!!! I had a consult with him, and was happy after looking at some before/after photos. Now, I have to be honest. This surgeon was not my 1st choice. Not even my 2nd or 3rd. And I was definitely nervous and not at all sure I would use this surgeon after our first consult. I debated back and forth with Egg, but as before, all the hard work I had put in started to unravel. I decided to ask for a second consult after having an MRI of my face and neck. I needed to see exactly what he would be working on, and how he was planning on doing it. Anal?? Maybe. But, once again, this is my face we are talking about. The 2nd consult put my mind at ease. Everything was going well. My only other stipulation is that it had to be done by the end of 2025. The front office said that would be no problem, and kept assuring me that it would happen. I have insurance (thankfully, and thanks to Egg), and my cost for the surgery was nothing compared to how much they are billing insurance. Damn, that is a lot of money. Let’s just say a down payment on a house, a new car, and some other expensive things, and there you go - that is the price to bill insurance. My cost is significantly lower, thank Olodumare. But still, it is expensive for me!! I am disabled, and currently, unemployed. I chose unemployment, meaning I left my job for my sanity (literally.) After healing, I will be working again, so have no fear, Egg. But, I digress…
This is where the story ends…for now. Be sure to check back for my updates. Some will not deal with FFS. But this is on my mind now, as it should be. So, with that, and a fleury of my hands and a bow (or curtsey), I will leave y’all wondering what comes next. Wander with me, as I wander through the crevices of my would, and enjoy the wonder that is my final push towards my surgery date, and all that entails!! For now, it is not goodbye. Rather, it is see you later! A Bientot!
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